My Neighbour Errol- Plague
Errol has found a new addictive game. It is called Plague and it is for the Android. In it, you get to create your own disease and attempt to infect the entire world before they come up with a cure.
Now, one of the interesting characteristics of this game is that you get to name your disease…and also e-mail your friends about its progress…you can see where this is going.
Being Errol, naturally the names of these diseases had to be as hilarious as possible. And what does Errol and every 10 year old find hilarious?
Poo, of course.
For instance, the first disease was named Buttsmear.
Then there was Turdlick.
And his current favourite: Fecalwart.
Imagine your’e in your office. Your boss is talking to you about some important thing with the word fiscal in it. And now imagine your phone suddenly lights up with the message “Fecal wart has destroyed the entire world”.
And so I decided that I too would try this game out. And I too would name my disease. And in response to the multiple disgusting names plaguing my phone, I decided to name my disease Errol.
Wanting to be truthful to life, I started the disease in Canada.
Keeping Errol’s lactose ways in mind and to how he may make many people feel, I chose my first symptom as nausea.
It wasn’t long before Errol began to bother people.
Before long, Canada didn’t have enough friends and he made the leap to the UK.
Being Errol, eventually pooping had to enter the picture.
And unsurprisingly, Errol was more infectious than TB.
Eventually people began to notice. But like all fools, they underestimated Errol.
And soon Canada was completely infected. They decided to work on an Errol cure…
And Errol responded by throwing Dysentery at them. Like you do.
It only made sense that everyone infected with Errol would go insane and poop everywhere.
Finally people began to realize that Errol wasn’t leaving.
And accordingly began to panic.
But by then it was far too late.
Even when the world tried to make a collective effort….
They could not stand up to the crazy that is Errol.
No one was spared.
They TRIED to change Errol.
But it was pointless.
Errol took over the world.
I should probably feel disturbed that this pretty much mirrors how Errol makes friends…except instead of dysentery and diarrhea it’s texts and loud yelling.
But that doesn’t bother me…what bothers me is that I’m just as addicted to this game. Consarnnit. He was right again.
So beware all….according to a mobile phone, there is no cure for Errol. Best to just sit back and let him infect your soul and eat your chips.