Coffee Cup: There’s a crack in my lid!

Me: Oh noes! Well it’s a good thing I spotted it! I certainly won’t take a sip.

Coffee Cup: You sure?

Me: Of course!

Coffee Cup: You’ll forget.

Me: What? No I won’t!

Coffee Cup: Yes you will.

Me: Why on earth would I forget something that could potentially scald me?!

Coffee Cup: It’s a three minute walk to the office. A lot can happen in three minutes.

Me: You know nothing, coffee cup. You are a coffee cup, and therefore incapable of sound logic.

Coffee Cup: Well, that’s just—

Me: Can’t talk! Thinking about a funny goat video! Ohhhh, that goat—(takes sip) OH GOD OWWWW IT’S IN MY SHIRT!

Coffee Cup: If I had the ability to look smug I would.